WONDERING AS I WANDER

 

Today, my hubs and I had a rather Twilight-Zone-ish experience.  All we wanted was to use a gift card to dine out at a favorite local restaurant.  We drove the 20 minutes, zoomed into the parking lot, and saw … a ghostly building with a “closed permanently” sign on the front door.  What a drag.  Oh well, we’ll just Google the address of the second restaurant on the gift card.  And by golly, this restaurant ALSO was permanently closed!  Whaaaat?  Ok, the third restaurant on the card we KNEW was open because we’d eaten there a couple of weeks ago.  We drove another 20 minutes and arrived at a very closed building, but for this day only, for preventative repairs.  By now, my stomach is gurgling and my blood sugar is starting to dive, and those little peppermint patties in my purse are siren-calling to me. I’m muttering in my mind that this is too hard, we should just go home and have a double-decker p.butter/jelly.  We forget about the gift card and head for another favorite reliable restaurant … you guessed it.  Finally, luck came with #5, where we indulged in something breaded, cheesy, and gooey.  I desired a huge chocolate cake to finish off the meal, mostly to sublimate my confusion and low-level frustration, but I refrained from cake today.

 

Why am I dragging you along for this ride, you ask?  Because, as usual, in my pondering of bad “luck” the Lord showed me to myself.  Again.  As I insolently  asked Him, “so, exactly what was I supposed to learn from this runaround today?” and He said, “go sit in a corner with my Word and think about it.”

 

Ya know how when you’re reading in the Old Testament about the wandering, grumbling, disobedient Israelites in the desert for 40 years, and you think to yourself, “well, I would never behave that way.”  Really?  Pride, much?  I then saw a gross similarity between me and them.  I was wanting to go home and have pb&j.  They wanted to go back to Egypt where all the yummy food was (Exodus 16:2-3).  I grumbled about running in circles all over town for an hour, dodging road construction.  They “were impatient because of the journey” and dodging the Lord’s disciplinary lessons (Numbers 21:45).  Oh yeah, I’m waaaaay more righteous and pious than those guys.

 

My God, how I thank You, first for causing me to ask You for your purpose (even though with an attitude).  And second, for Your immediate answer.  I thank You that I needn’t worry about dying in the wilderness as immediate punishment for my attitude, because I know that You have already permanently transferred me to your Kingdom.  I need fear no divine vengeance from You, knowing that your loving divine discipline is for my good and Your glory.  I praise Your patience and tender mercy in dealing with me, your whiny child, teaching me to whine less, glorify me less, and praise You more.

HONOR ROLL

 

 

’Tis now a little past the season, but it’s still fresh -- that glorious time of citizenry grading another new President on his work during his first magical 100 days, showing him the love … or not.  Oh, the aroma of judgment wafting around the country, forming into lampoon-shards of “you’re incompetent!” thus forcing said President into self-defense mode, which also never makes anyone happy.

It seems that no matter who’s elected, a few people, or a lot, are gonna loudly proclaim that he deserves a rotund “F.”  Sadly, Presidents seldom make an immediate A+ impression.

When you think about it, who really does make the honor roll?  Most brand new spouses flounder in each other’s eyes during the first 100 days … or hours. New employees/employers soon show their colors of slothfulness and/or bossiness.  Even wee babies find fault with their parents’ lack of ability to move fast enough to fulfill their copious needs and wants.  “Hey Dad -– you can do better!  C-minus for you!”

Oh dear, I just had an appalling remembrance.  Thirty years ago, when I was a brand new, uneducated, and temperamental baby Christian, I recall having sporadic tendencies to “grade” God on His 100-day performance as my own personal miracle worker.  I sometimes felt that He didn’t perform as I thought He should.  I grumbled, whined, and sulked at Him.  If I didn’t immediately get what I wanted, my large inner child muttered, “but this isn’t right, You aren’t giving me what I want!  I’m not impressed with You right now.  You’re not doing a good job!”  Yes, I was the very embodiment of the clay talking back to its potter (Isaiah 29:16, 45:9).  I’m now retroactively shocked at myself.

Then came the news flash -- this attitude is the equivalent of “grading” God!  It took some growing up on my part to learn that I had no business giving Him a “B” (or worse!), when instead I should be humbling myself before Him, asking Him teach and grade me (Psalm 25:5).  I think often of Job being tactfully graded by God with, “and where were you when I did …. [everything]?” (Job 38:4 – 41:34).  And Lord, lest I become prideful over my great growth, if You catch me grading You ever again, please put me in a corner to think about what I did.

My gracious, loving, patient, and sovereign Father, how I thank you for teaching me, causing me to cease grading You in any way, but instead to be praising You in every way. You created me, not the reverse (Psalm 100:3). Please continue to mold me, being taught by You in every aspect of life.  My Jesus, I’m to learn from You and find rest for my soul (Matthew 11:28). How freeing it is, knowing that You, the God of my salvation, will teach me Your way, and instruct me in the way I should choose.  All your paths are lovingkindness and truth.  Why would I want anything else?

 

WHINING TO GOD

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you couldn’t help yourself, you just started whining to God?  I know I have.

“I don’t wanna be in rush hour in a blizzard with only a box of donut crumbs for sustenance!”

“I don’t wanna be standing in the unemployment line!”

“I don’t wanna be in the hospital with a broken leg ’cause I was rollerblading at age 60!”

Okay, that last one isn’t true.  It was just a broken bone in the foot whilst walking the dog and dodging oncoming traffic.

Anyway, as uncomfortable as it is to admit that I can indeed be a whiner, I know many of you will come forward and admit that you are also whiners.  And if you don’t, well, you’re better people than me, Gunga Din.

There is indeed a point here.  When lingering in the Psalms, this incident about the Jews’ captivity really stuck with me.  The captors asked them to sing a song of Zion, and they responded, “How can we sing the Lord’s song in a foreign land?” (Psalm 137:4).  There it is -- “I don’t wanna be captive in another country!”  Can’t say as I blame them, it sounds really horrible.

However, fast-forward many centuries and compare it with the Paul and Silas when they were captive in Philippian jail (Acts 16:25; Philippians 1:12-14).  What if they had whined to God, “I don’t wanna be in this jail?  Do I have to?”  It’s possible God would have told them, “No, you don’t have to.  You GET to.  You get to have the privilege in your confinement of pointing that guard, those other prisoners, to ME, to salvation.”

Ahh, it’s making sense now.  Paul and Silas were confined in jail, but by their joyful witness, a guard was saved.  Paul understood that, even though he might be in bondage, the word of God never has been, and never will be, imprisoned (2 Timothy 2:9).  Paul’s temporary physical bondage led a person in spiritual bondage to sin to be freed from it.

Thank You, my Father, for showing me that whining accomplishes nothing, but praising and glorifying You accomplishes everything. You’ve given me a firm foundation to know that if You choose to place me in a “foreign-land captivity and/or prison” circumstance in the future, it could very well be a divine appointment to spiritual freedom for someone else.  Thank You for scriptural examples of Your purpose at work in Your children.